I have a lot to do today.
I have a reinforced concrete design project due Monday.
I have a hydraulics assignment due Monday.
Both those classes have exams this week.
I have my Senior Design proposal due on Thursday.
I have jury duty on Friday, for which I will have to skip three classes.
I have Drill with the Navy Reserve next weekend.
Obviously the one or two people that may end up reading this don’t care what my schedule is like. Nor do they care about this blog, which has all but died. A one or two post per year blog is nothing to get excited about.
However, I am (for some inexplicable reason) overcome or inspired to say something today. I have not thought this out beforehand and do not really intend on editing it to ensure that it is my instinctive thoughts, nothing more, nothing less.
Two things have happened lately which culminated in this inspiration. The first event occurred while coaching cross country. The head coach brought in an article about goal setting, which encouraged runners to speak their goal and make it public. The simple act of making a goal public adds an element of seriousness to the undertaking at hand, it adds gravity, it makes you accountable for your actions, it adds credibility to the pursuit.
For the runners, we put a sheet of paper on the door to the small closet the cross country team uses as an ‘office.’ We call it 'The Vault' and it contains a small couch, an unplugged mini-fridge, a stereo from 1992, and serves more as a lost-and-found than anything else. The paper was taped to the outside of the door, not the inside. Anyone in the school that happened to walk by would be able to read what was written on it. At the top of the page, we wrote ‘Say it Loud’ and left the rest of it blank and gave no direction to our runners on what the purpose of the sheet was, they could use it how they saw fit.
Within a few days, it was filled with goals for the upcoming track season, with goals ranging all across the board. The kids had laid their goals out for the world to see. They had taken a huge risk and put themselves in a vulnerable and exposed position. The world (or at least anyone who cared to look) would know if they succeeded or failed. The world was now watching.
The second thing to happen to me was StarCraft 2. I actually don’t play StarCraft 2. I really, really want too, but I know that if I installed it on my PC, I would never get any work done. I know myself well enough to realize that it would have a severe impact on my grades, so I have resisted it. But this isn’t about playing StarCraft 2, it’s about watching it. I watch it more than I watch sports. I get drawn into the games, I cheer for my favorite players, and know more about the intricacies of the game than I do about basketball.
But the most impactful thing that has happened is that I started watching the Day[9] daily. On the surface the daily is merely a tactics and strategy analysis show (which naturally appeals to my experience as a Tactical Officer in the Navy). But Day[9] has much more than that going on. Yeah, he tells funny stories – especially about all his experiences with the opposite gender, all of whom seem to be named Felicity. And, yeah he is a pretty damn good gamer and tactician. But more so, his views on the process of learning and exploration and his general approach to life are pretty dang inspiring.
So, what does any of this mean?
I have no idea. As I said, I really haven’t thought through any of this yet, which for me is a pretty unusual thing. Part of me, I think, is jealous of people like the kids on the cross country team and Day[9]. These people are inspired enough with what they love to put themselves out there, to risk it all. I have several things I really love to do that I utterly am failing at. I don’t mean that I suck at them, I mean that I am failing in pursuing them. I love building with Lego (and am admittedly pretty damn good at it), but have probably only spent 10 hours in the past 3 months doing so. I love and have a diverse collection of really good video games that have never been played. But, I just play the same three or four games over and over with only a rare breaking out to play any of the numerous titles that have never even been turned on.
I simply feel that I am missing the passion and fire that I see on a daily basis from high school runners and an online StarCraft 2 strategist. However, rather than depress me, I have found the reverse to be true. I am finding myself inspired. Inspired to pursue my interests and engage in the art of learning. Day[9] has a motto for his show, ‘Where we learn to be a better gamer.’ I want to reengage my own efforts to learning to be a better me, to put myself out there in a vulnerable and exposed position, because only from that spot will I ever be able to excel.
